Small Insecurities, Really

Wow, I haven't written in awhile. Oh well.

A year ago I was travelling to Indiana for my younger sisters college graduation. This year, I am working, seven days straight. Haha. man. At least the hours will be very nice in my paycheck. That's what I'm aiming for, and also saving up money for various things I need/want including a visit later on this summer to see my sister again. She is moving to England in September for graduate school (yeah, England!) and I want to see her before she leaves, as well as family and friends I haven't seen in at least a year.

It'll be strange to go home again, to visit. Last year it was weird to be back there. Not in the sense that my family and friends have changed, it's just everything else. The old woods we used to walk around in around the boatdock at the lake is now gone, and filled with multi-million dollar houses. Like most of the cornfields I was used to seeing as driving to and from school are now subdivisions. Houses have taken over. My little town is now overrun by people, and lots of them. It was strange to see a car dealership (a nice one at that) placed on the State Road crossing through the main part of town. At the time I lived there, we had only one stop light in the downtown portion. Now there has to be at least three. It's just weird to say all that because I feel like I'm an elderly person recounting all the things that have changed, but I'm only 24. I haven't been living at "home" in six years, so that could be why I notice all the changes. My old school system has added a new school onto the property and has changed the placement of grades throughout the schools. Used to be an elementary school with a middle school across the small service road and then across the State Road was the high school, all three close to each other. Now apparently there's a fourth school or maybe even a fifth, oh yes that's the alternative school. The other is like an intermediate school. All those schools. Do they serve a purpose? I guess it relieves the amount of kids in each school. I know that the second high school I went to was overcrowded with students.

So we have better weather going on now. Was 75 yesterday and will be the same today. We have a swimming pool beside the rental office, unfortunately it's outdoors but it is heated, I asked. So, since it's outdoors and very visible from the parking areas (has a painted white metal fencing surrounding it) but it's clearly not hidden. Which my point is that I like to swim with not EVERYONE SEEING ME. Anyway, which I will need to purchase a one-piece swim suit or just a decent looking 2pc so that I won't feel embarassed being looked at outside. I'm retarded, I know this. Apparently I have a problem with my weight. I don't weigh too much, actually the opposite but I'm the road to look normal. Up to 118.5 now, I am quite happy.

Royal and I were talking awhile ago, and suddenly my headache turned into a migrane and wouldn't go away. I took some Tylenol -Rapid Release and thought it'd work. Nope. About two hours later it went a bit dull. I laughed really hard then POW! It came back and started to throb pretty bad above my right ear, and it's been at least an hour, and it is still throbbing. Rapid Release my ass. Well, it isn't really Tylenol's fault. It is a migrane, so yeah..

Soon I'm going offline here and go back to reading the 5th Harry Potter book. I need to somehow get rid of this thing w/o meds, as I don't have any. I hope sleeping will help.

Happy Friday


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